Have You Ever Wondered...

Why does the sun lighten our hair,
but darken our skin?

Why can't women put on mascara
with their mouths closed?

Why don't you ever see the headline
"Psychic Wins Lottery"?

Why is "abbreviated" such a long word?

Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?

Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor,
and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?

Why is the man who invests all your money
called a broker?

Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic
called rush hour?

Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?

When dog food is new and improved tasting,
who tests it?

Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?

You know that indestructible black box
that is used on airplanes?????
Why don't they make the whole plane
out of that stuff?!

Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?

Why are they called apartments
when they are all stuck together?

If con is the opposite of pro,
is Congress the opposite of progress?