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Astrological Prayers

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Aries

Dear God, please give me patience... And could you do it right now?


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Taurus

Dear God, help me accept change, but not too quick.


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Gemini

Dear God! Who is God? Where is God? Why is God?


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Cancer

Dear God!!!


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Leo

Yes?


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Virgo

Dear God, please make us perfect and don't mess it up like You did the last time.


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Libra

Dear God, please help me to be decisive, but on the other hand, what do you think is best?


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Scorpio

Our Father, forgive us our debts as we forgive our debtors, even though the b*****ds don't deserve it!


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Sagittarius

Dear Lord, if I've told you once, I've told you a million times, help me stop exaggerating.


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Capricorn

Dear God! I'd like to ask you to help me, but I learned a long time ago not to rely on anyone else!


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Aquarius

Dear God, I know I like change, but this chaos is ridiculous!!


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Pisces

Dear Lord, as long as I'm going to drink this fifth of Scotch tonight, please use the stimulation for Thy glory .


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